Covid

Covid jokes

COVID-19

  • Dr. Fauci would be surprised to know that R. Kelly didn't catch COVID-19.

    But since COVID is 19, it's too old for him.

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  • Loss

  • Your grandmother died because she fell on the highest floor of the hotel. Your grandfather died because he got shot while saving your mother. If he didn't save your mother, you wouldn't be here.

    You grew up in a world full of viruses. You wanted the virus to be gone. There's only one way, but you have to know it. I can't tell it for you.

    Your mother got Covid-19. You prayed and prayed all night, hoping that she would be okay. The next day, the doctors went to your house without your mother. You asked, "Where is my mother?!" The doctors said, "Your mother is gone, so we came here to tell you." The doctors left. Another hour, you were thinking while crying, "Why was my prayer not working? Lord, why'd you let me down?"

    You searched on Google "How to bring back the dead." The Google workers declined it. Your father left you because he loved another girl. Your brothers are still with you, but what if they get the virus? Who will be with you?

    Don't forget Jesus is still there for you. Don't give up, keep going, and you will succeed soon. You will find your own family and beat the coronavirus.

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  • Vaccine

  • I just got my COVID vaccine, and this lady said, "You have no idea what you put in your body." I said, "Yet you are eating chorizo."

    Hunting

  • I was going to go hunting but then I realized, schools are closed due to covid.

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  • Friend

  • A friend called me a while back saying, "I have COVID.... I can't breathe, I really have a hard time breathing."

    I reply saying, "Dude, you need to work on your George Floyd jokes."

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  • Police

  • The police officer in London, who used fake Covid rules to arrest a young woman, drive her more than 50 miles out of London in a hire car, murder her, and do whatever to her, has appealed against his Whole Life tariff.

    He should be relieved it was only that! Could've been worse... could've married her!

    COVID-19

  • Imagine if on April first the government says, "Hahhaha, you all fell for it. Covid-19 is fake; we actually killed all those people, lol."

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