Cops jokes
Why did a cop in the 1960s cross the road? To arrest a faggot for cross-dressing.
I wasn't planning on going for a run today, but those cops came out of nowhere.
I wasn’t planning on going for a run today, but those cops came out of nowhere.
I got the joke from my brother.
What do you call a group of cops having a sleep over?
Pigs in a blanket.
Why do kids want to become cops?
They want to find the guy who touched them.
What is red, white, and blue all over?
A dead cop.
Riddle: A man killed his wife in his car with a knife, and no one could see him. He threw the body out of the car and threw the knife off a cliff. When he got home, the cops called the man and told him his wife was dead and to come to the scene of the crime. The man agreed and rushed to the scene. When he got there, the cops immediately arrested him. Why?
ANSWER: The cops never said where the scene of the crime is.
I am an actual police officer (Not gonna mention with which department in case they actually check this site) and tbh I find these jokes funny as fuck, carry on boys.
I posted up on my story that I got a new cut. My friends and family called the cops...
I used to be emo.
What’s one thing Obama proved during his presidency?
No matter how far a brotha gets in life, he’s still going to have the cops on his back.
Ever wondered why Usain Bolt runs fast? He's training to outrun the cops.
I wasn’t planning on going for a run today, but those cops came out of nowhere!
*trigger alert*
Why did the racist cop shut down the space brothel?
Because there were too many black holes.
Why did the cop show up early to the protest? To beat the crowd.
What did the cop say to the muslim breaking the law?
"That's against th-Allah (read like da-law)."
How does the cop respond to being called racist?
He said, "How can I be racist? My wife's eyes [are] black."
Things you never want to do in jail:
- Never piss off an inmate. - Don’t start fights with the cops. - Don’t drop the soap. - Don’t run away from the cops.
Two priests are driving down a road when they are pulled over by the cops.
The cop shines a light in their faces and signals to the driver to roll down his window.
"We're searching for two child molesters," he says.
The driver leans over to the other priest, and they whisper between themselves.
Finally, he turns back to the policeman. "Ok. We'll do it."
Cops be like dead from COVID hahaha. Should have listened to the law, you dumb dead pigs!
Cops have the hardest job: they have to tell women they have the right to remain silent and know damn well she will not have the ability.