Cookie jokes
My dad had a very unfortunate accident with his death. I clearly asked for Jammy Dodgers and got Bourbons!
How do adults like their cookies like their orphans?
Homemade.
If your dad didn't bring the milk, what are you dipping your cookies in?
Why was the cookie angry? Because someone ate the chips!
I told a cookie a joke the other day.
It just crumbled.
How to learn your Vitamins:
A = Art.
B = Bouncy Balls.
C = Cookies.
D = Da Sun.
You'll be smarter than a doctor next time you visit!
Little Johnny walks in on his grandfather smoking a cigar.
“May I smoke a cigar?” asks Johnny.
The grandpa replies, “Well, does your dick touch your asshole?”
Johnny replied, “No,” and left the room.
The next day Johnny sees his grandpa getting into a car.
“Can I drive the car?” asks Johnny.
“Does your dick touch your asshole?”
“No.”
The day after that, Grandpa sees Johnny about to eat a cookie.
“Johnny, may I have some of your cookie?” asked the grandpa.
“Does your dick touch your asshole, grandpa?”
“Yep.”
“Then go fuck yourself, this is my cookie.”
Why do the orphans love going to the bakery down the street so much? Because their cookies are homemade.
Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?
🎉🎇🎊🎆🎈
The FBI said, "Open up!" I shout to them.
A person said, "Cookie sale." I opened up. He fucked me.
"People are more honest when they are tired, so I made my nephew do push-ups 50 times when I realized he stole my cookies."
What’s black and white and red all over?
A Milano’s cherry.
Dad, I'm hungry.
Hi, hungry, I'm Dad! 👋🍪🍩🍬🌮🍔🍗🍟🍤🍉🍭🍫🍰
Why did Hitler's cookies taste bad? He forgot to clean out the oven.
Why can't orphans have cookies?
They are home made.
What did the cat say to the jar of cookies?
"Ground beef!"
I am like Cookie Monster on steroids when it comes to cookies.
There was a disabled kid at my door. He said, "I'm selling some cookies, want to buy one?" I said, "Well, if you stand up, sure."
Why do orphans love Oreos?
Because when they have a family pack, they can eat it all!
I was trying to poison Santa, but he killed my dad and ate all the cookies! 😤