Conversation jokes

"Mom? Don't freak out, but I'm in the hospital."

"Aaron, you've been a doctor for over 8 years now, please stop starting every phone conversation we have with that."

One day a computer said to another computer, "Why are you so dumb?"

The other computer replied, "Because I have low memory."

What did the drunk woman say to the man after leaving the bar?

"Alcohol, you later!"

If you are talking to an Indian and notice a red dot appear on their forehead, be careful of what you said... They are recording it down... Careful... (no offense) pure joke.

Two fish were in a tank. One turned to the other and asked: "Hey, how do you drive this thing?"

Someone went up to an orphan and asked him why he was talking to the air. He said he was talking to his mom.

Guy: Michael Jackson wasn’t in ancient times!

Me: hee hee egypt.

What did the mother say to Michael J. on the beach?

"Excuse me sir, but you're in my son!"

What did one squirrel say to the other? "Do you have any nuts?"

The first windmill said to the second, "What's your favorite type of music?"

The second windmill said, "I'm a big metal fan!"

My friend got a sorry excuse for a new hair style, she says "How do you like my new hair style?"

Me: I think it's a great idea, when are you getting one?

"You have to do this," and my sister said, "Well, I don't care."

And I said, "Well, you care enough to respond back, oh my gosh!"

"Freshfry, please leave me and prince alone! I never asked you to join our chat!"

I'm really bored and I don't know what's up with Prince. He isn't talking to me.

And Freshfry, why are you so mean now?

What did one Geodude say to the other Geodude?

Let’s rock!

What did the tree say to the emo kid? Wanna hang?

One day, a little girl was texting her friend. "Guess what, Angelica!" said the little girl.

"What?" Angelica replied.

"I'm a guy."

Two balls sit inside a bucket. One turned to another and said, "Hey man, boing, are you sentient, too?"

The other one said, "I’m sapient, you are sentient!"

BOINGZINGA!?!

Two windmills stand at a farm. One asks the other, "What is your favorite kind of music?"

The other windmill replies, "I'm a huge metal fan!"

Me as a 5-year-old: How do you relate to the Twin Towers?

Friend: What?

Me: Every time I think of them, I feel sad.