I have a really good construction joke but I’ll have to post it later because I’m still working on it
Three construction workers were sitting on the bridge that they were building, having their lunch break. The first guy says, "If I get a Vegemite sandwich again, I am going to jump off this bridge." The second guy says, "If I get a peanut butter sandwich again, I am going to jump off this bridge." The third guy says, "If I get another strawberry jam sandwich, then I am going to jump off this bridge." The next day, the first guy gets a Vegemite sandwich, the second guy gets a peanut butter sandwich, and the third guy gets a strawberry jam sandwich. All three guys jump off the bridge and die. The next day at their funerals, the first wife says, "If he just told me, I would have given him a different sandwich." The second guy's wife says, "It is all my fault. If only I knew." The third wife says, "I don't get it, he makes his own lunch."
My teacher started talking about houses then I said I don't want that informansion.
A man walks into a bar with a slab of concrete under his arm and says, "A beer please! and one for the road!"
How many screws does it take to construct a lesbians bed? None, it's all tongue and groove...
Three nuns died in a car crash. They went up to heaven at the pearly gates. The gatekeeper said, "This really should not have happened, so I am going to send you back to earth as different people. Tell me who you want to be or look like." The first nun said, "I want to look like Madonna." Puff, you look like her now, but you can’t use her name. And sent her down to earth. The second one said, "I want to look like Marilyn Monroe." He then makes her look like her and sends her down to earth. The third nun said, "I want to look like Sarah Pipalini." The gatekeeper says to her, "Sarah Pipalini, who is that?" She gives the gatekeeper a newspaper article. He reads it, shakes his head no, and says, "It’s not Sarah Pipalini, it's Sahara pipeline laid by 500 men."
How are guys and tile floors alike?
If you lay them right the first time you can walk all over them for years.
Americans prefer houses with basements. In fact, they're best cellars!
Q: Why did the two gate-builders start fighting? A: Because they were fencing.
You know the drill, but do you know the hammer? Hah, nailed that one. But I also think I screwed it up.
wanna hear a construction joke. nah i'm still working on it.
Hey wanna hear a construction joke? -sure Oh sorry I'm still working on it :-]
what do you call a sleeping bull? A bull dozer
What do you call a male cow who’s taking a nap?
A bull dozer
A cardboard belt is a waste of paper.
Hot shingles in your neighbourhood wanting to get nailed.
What is the similarity between pink floyd and Donald trump: The best thing they did was a wall
Yo mama so old the carpenter uses her crotch as sandpaper.
The twin towers are like genders, there used to be two of them.
A father and three sons are renovating a house when a wall of that house collapses and breaks the father's back. Keeping calm, he tells the sons, "Well, I guess this is what you would call back-breaking labor." He chuckled, then passed out from pain.
