Comparison jokes
What does Madeleine McCann and my old Xbox have in common?
They both died with red rings.
AOT > ur fav anime.
What is the difference between a wagon filled with sand and a wagon filled with newborns?
You cannot unload the sand with a pitchfork.
What’s the difference between Jesus and a plank of wood?
A plank of wood can take nails to the extremities without screaming.
What's the difference between drugs and children? I don't sell drugs.
What hits the ground first, the feather or the emo?
The feather, because the emo is hung in the tree.
Girls are just like rocks; the flat ones get skipped.
73 Earths can fit in Uranus.
What does a pickle look like a p*nis?
Sometimes when I think I'm ugly, I just think of my sister and it makes me feel better.
What's the difference between a woman and a freezer?
A freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
What's the difference between Paul Walker and a computer?
I give a fuck when my computer crashes.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples are actually picked.
What's the difference between a baby and a bowling ball?
You can't use a pitchfork to get the bowling ball out of the truck.
Your forehead is so big, Mastermind got jealous.
You call me ugly, but maybe that is why we look alike.
I am not a nerd ;). I'm just smarter than you.
Your forehead is so big and shiny it looks like a solar field.
Yo mama so big, she thought Christopher Rhoades was a tampon.
My friend said, "Why do you have depression? There is so much happiness in the world." And I said, "Why do you have asthma? There is so much air in the world."