Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
When I was little, I used to think that the people in cartoons were real people...until I turned 7. I realized that it was just people doing voices. Sad, isn't it?
I'm still playing hide & seek with my dad.
I always wanted to go to the store as a kid because I always wanted to look for my dad that went to go get the milk, but I could never find him.
My Dad said he got me from the shops, and I remembered what Grandpa said about him.
Why am I so fat? When I was younger my mother said I should be the bigger person.
Never say to an orphan, "Bye buddy, hope you find your dad!"
Why did the orphan cross the road? They thought they saw their mother.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
What is an orphan's favorite joke?
"Yo mama" jokes.
Why don't orphans drink milk?
'Cause their parents have not came back with it yet.
There's going to be a party at the orphanage tonight. I'm bringing a gun.
Why are orphans so famous for their jokes?
Because everyone says go big or go home!
I have a short TRUE story of how I found out my brother was gay and did "it" with his best friend.
When my brother was 12-13 years old, he fucked his best friend and I saw it. I was like 4-5 years old, UNDERSTANDING what "it" stood for at the time. All I heard was "ahh" and "mmm". The only thing that traumatized me the most was when my brother moaned "daddy". I was so traumatized that I told my mother about it, she rolled her eyes and said, "He's probably playing a game with Evan". BULLSHIT... NO YOU DUMBASS. He was playing the game "SEX", more like "GAY SEX".
I even told my father and he said, "I don't understand what you're trying to say". I told him DIRECTLY that I heard my brother say "daddy" to his damn best friend!
I actually got so curious, I opened the door and saw them doing "69". I was blank white after I saw it. I will NEVER forget that he did "it" with his own best friend.. NEVER forget about it.
(just a btw, I still have the image stuck in my head and never forget how YOUNG he was..)
(He ain't no virgin anymore I guess lmfao.)
(MORE STORIES COMING SOON =D)
Why did Sally get a black eye?
Because she tried to play patty cake.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
'Cause they don't know where home is.
My girlfriend broke up with me yesterday. I asked her why. She said, "Because you're a pedophile." I replied, "Pedophile! That's a big word for an eight year old."
A young boy is in a tepee with his father, just after his sister's naming ceremony. Curious to how it works, he asks his dad, "Father, why is my sister's name Tulip?"
His father responds, "That is her name because a tulip was the first thing she saw when she first opened her eyes."
The boy was still puzzled. "What about big brother Sparrow?"
"His name is Sparrow because a sparrow landed on him when he first began walking."
The boy finally asked how he was named. "Well, we decided to name you the same way as your sister."
The boy nods with understanding, "Thank you, father."
"No problem, Two-Dogs-Fucking."
If you ever get bored, tell an orphan to take two days off their calendar. If they ask why, say, "Because you're missing Father's Day and Mother's Day."
Why do kids like Michael Jackson so much?
Because he's made out of plastic, and that's what toys are made out of! 😂
