Character

Character jokes

Toy Story

What's the Pixar movie close to being a pornstar? Toy Story... *I got a friend in me*

Mario

Do not be racist; be like Mario. He's an Italian plumber, who was made by the Japanese, speaks English, looks like a Mexican, jumps like a black man, and grabs coins like a Jew!

Priest

What's the difference between Woody from Toy Story and a Catholic priest?

One goes limp when a child walks in the room.

Orphan

Why couldn't the orphan watch Spiderman? He couldn't find his way home.

Memes

Lie

Disney

What did Cinderella say when she sat on Pinocchio? "Lie to me."

Dad

Boy 1: "Sonic is a fictional character."

Boy 2: "Yeah, just like your dad."

Mickey Mouse

Mickey Mouse went to a psychologist and told him, “I’m having problems with my girlfriend.”

The psychologist said, “You mentioned that you think she is crazy.”

He said, “I didn’t say she was crazy, I said she’s fucking Goofy!”

Shrek

Roses are red, violets are blue.

Shrek is ugly, but not uglier than you.

Lyric

What's Gru's favorite Beyoncé lyric? "Who run the world... Gorls."

Skeleton

*sans*: Why was the skeleton depressed? Because Frisk keeps resetting and it resets when he lost his phone.

Lie

Disney

What did Snow White say when she sat on Pinocchio? "Lie to me."

Orphan

Why would an orphan be a good Spider-Man?

Because his parents will be far from home.

Difference

What's the difference between Harry Potter and Anne Frank?

Harry made it out of the chamber.

Blanket

What do Michael Jackson and Linus have in common? They both carry a little blanket.