Character

Character jokes

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Friend

  • So, my friend and I were talking this time. I asked them what they would do if they ever met Rengoku. They said that they would probably like shake his hand or something, but I said I would lick his forehead. Wtf?

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  • Lorax

  • I am the Lorax. I speak for trees. I have the high ground, and I will cut off your knees.

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    Autobiography

  • My initials are K.M.C.

    Which could also stand for "Kill Main Character".

    Which I am planning to do in this book I’m writing.

    I’m writing an autobiography.

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  • Mickey Mouse

  • Mickey Mouse is speaking with a divorce attorney...

    ...and the attorney says, "I'm sorry Mickey, I've gone over all of Minnie's medical history and I find no evidence of mental illness."

    To which Mickey replies, "I didn't say she's crazy! I said she's fucking Goofy!"

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    Bin Laden

  • What is the difference between Bin Laden and Santa? One stops at the top of the skyscraper.

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    Mario

  • Do not be racist; be like Mario. He's an Italian plumber, who was made by the Japanese, speaks English, looks like a Mexican, jumps like a black man, and grabs coins like a Jew!

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  • Solo

  • Rey: Join me, Ben, you don't have to be alone anymore, join me.

    Ben: But Rey, I've always been solo.

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    Dwarf

  • I ran into a dwarf and he said: "Well, I’m not Happy."

    Then which one are you?

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