Cant jokes
Why can't orphans play baseball?
'Cause they don't know where home is.
Why can't Columbus be offered a professional football team?
Because then Cincinnati would want one too.
So, a man was on a ledge ready to kill himself because he got laid off at work and his girlfriend cheated on him. He was about to jump until he saw from a mountainside a little guy with no arms dancing around. So he thought, "Maybe my life ain't so bad." So he went to the mountainside. "Thank you," he said, "I was gonna jump off a bridge and kill myself until I saw you dancing, even though you have no arms. Dancing?" the armless man said bitterly, "My asshole itches and I can't scratch it."
Why can't an orphan go to McDonald's? There's no point in the words "happy meal."
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is. Sorry for the dark joke :>
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They never hit home.
There's a new cooking programme on BBC1. The contestants are victims of domestic violence. It's called "Can't Cook... Right Hook."
What's an orphan's favorite food? Nothing, they can't afford it.
Why can't Helen Keller drive?
Because she's a woman? No, seriously, why can't she drive? Because she's dead.
Why are orphans bad at baseball? Because they can't go home.
Why can't two Asians make a white baby?
Because two wongs don't make a white.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home.
I can't see the bee.
It's by the beehive.
What's yellow and can't swim?
A school bus full of screaming children.
Why can't dinosaurs talk?
'Cause they're dead.
To the man in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket, "You can hide but you can't run."
Why can't you fool an aborted fetus?
Because it wasn't born yesterday.
Q: Why can't Helen Keller drive?
A: Because she's a woman.
Why can't I drink tea??
Because I laugh too much. TEEEEEHEHEEE
If you take a cap off a bottle, is it decapitation?
Sorry guys, I tried. I tried harder this time. I'll try again. Sorry, I can't delete things.