Birth

Birth Jokes

A girl walks in the room she asks her my why's my name flower her mom said when you were born a flower fell on your head brick walks in the room jasvidnqzkdvsosbd

What is the difference between a hoe's birth Daddy and her pimp Daddy? The first daddy plants the seed in a cunt and the second reaps the harvest from the cunt.

I'm just gonna say it. And don't get offended but I'm so sick of the media bieng on the female side. It never shows what life is like for a male.

Yes women do have it hard in life because they have to give birth etc.

But men have it pretty hard too if not harder. Males are criticised for showing emotions.

Men have to go to war on the front lines.

Boys have less support from their friends because showing any emotion is a sign of weakness.

Boys have to wear trousers in schools where they practically burn to death in summer meanwhile girls get to wear dresses and skirts. And now we hear girls complaining about them not being allowed to wear trousers. Yet we haven't ever heard anything about boys protesting about wearing shorts to school. It's because no one will take a man's protest seriously because the media is always against the men.

Man-rape is unheard of in the media and I've never seen anything in any form of news accusing a woman as a rapist.

We are expected to gather up our guts ask a girl to be their girlfriend, we have to take them on dates, pay the bill, buy them gifts when the girls never do anything like that for us males. We have to get a job while they put on makeup and go out with their friends and spend 3 months worth of the money the man has made.

And the women say we only rape women and that we restrict women from doing certain things like fighting in world wars.

It's because most males do not want females to get hurt. Yet we are criticised for this.

I propose a idea that on the 19 of September every year (until we get the point across) all males do not go to work. etc.

Whose going to put out all the fires? The two fire'women' at the local fire station. Who is going to work in the major corporations? The secretary's and the receptionist?

Women are always saying that the world will be a better place if they're are no men around. Let's show them how wrong they are.

(this event can be done worldwide)

Share this with as many people who still believe in the rights of the males.

(I'm not against feminism it's just that everything in the media is about some stupid problem women are complaining about + hatred for males everywhere.

But I think that nowadays women have more rights than men because they can wear what they want, do what they want and never get criticised or face any consequences.)

here some questions firesharky, 1-What color hair do u have? 2-Whats MY parents names? What hospital where u born in. 3-What state where u born in? Do not say i dont know.

Mary had a great big ram his fleece was white as snow when on hands and knees our Mary went his wad was sure to blow

Month by month her belly grew increasing in it's girth and when five months had flown by our Mary did give birth

And Mary had a little lamb a little lamb, a little lamb....

A heavily pregnant woman is in an accident and gives birth to twins while comatose. Upon awakening some days later, the doctors tell her that her brother Tom filled out the birth certificates while she was out.

"Oh no, Tom's an idiot, what did he name my daughter?" she asked the nurse.

"Denise."

"That's not a bad name. And what did he name the boy?"

"Tom Junior."

Kariana: Dad and mom, what is this bull? nonsense?!?!

Treon: How did you find that?!

Kariana: It was under the cabnet where you told me to put the streamers. I found these under the cabnet, did she have another sister you didn't tell me about? Now tell the truth, or else!

Petina: Now what have we told you about going it to things that are not yours!

Kariana: I just told you to say the fricking truth now who is Faineni? Were is she? Who is she? What is her date of birth? Why do I have her bra under here and why....IS IT UNDER THE FRICKING CABNET!!!!! ANSWER ME!!!!!!!!!

Treon: We can't!

Kariana: BULL SHIT!!!!!!!!

yo mama so old on her birth certificate it said expired yo mama so fat when she sat non a rainbow skittles popped out yo mama so fat when she sat on walmart the prices went down yo mama so poor she chases a garbage truck with a shopping list yo mama so ugly she made the deviel go to church

You're so short, when you were born, the doctor couldn't tell if you were a boy, a girl, or a Jimmy Dean pork sausage.

Father awaits the birth of his first child. The obstetrician: "Unfortunately he has no arms". "I'll love it all the same". But the obstetrician adds: "It is also without legs, trunk, head". "I'll love it all the same". Then the obstetrician confessed to him: "I'm sorry, but only this ear was born". "I'll love it all the same". And the obstetrician: "Talk to him closer: he's deaf!".

mom, mom I'm holding my little brother's hand ..... little Johnny good! but he's not born yet