Bigness jokes

There is a rich child and a poor child. The rich child invites the poor child to his house and shows him all the toys and tells him: "Look at what a beautiful radio-controlled airplane I have! You don't have it because you are poor!" The poor child answers: "You're right, it's very nice, but I have one thing that you don't have!" The rich child then invites him into the garden and shows him the swimming pool, the trampoline, and all the other games that can be done outdoors and says to the poor child: "Look at that beautiful swimming pool I have! It is very big; you don't have it because you are poor!" And the poor child says: "Beautiful, it is really beautiful! But one thing that you don't have." So the rich child feels bad. He says: "Wait, but I'm rich! How is it possible? I have everything I want because I'm rich. Why do you have something that I don't have?" And the poor child says: "I have cancer!"

Boobs are like friends: you have big ones, small ones, real ones, fake ones, but they all get taken out by cancer.

Your forehead is so big you could have put an H for Kobe to land on.

What is big, round, and gassy? Uranus.

A Story:

I lived in a small house. Behind my house was a big forest. If I went in the forest, then I heard scary sounds. That was very dreadful. I had a son. He was 9 years old. One day he went into the forest and did not come back. I called the police, but it couldn't help. I went looking. I really wanted my son Robby back. I missed him so! With a flashlight and compass, I went into the dark, eerie forest. Then the noises came again, but this time I also heard a scream. A scream from a nine year old child. It was Robby, certainly! I stopped in front of a tunnel.

Sequel follows...

One day, little Johnny was playing with his toys and looked out the window. He saw the neighbor's kid laying face-first in the grass, not breathing.

Little Johnny continued to shoot his nerf gun at the neighbor's big booty cheeks. No movement at all. After little Johnny went to get a snack, he looked out the window again and the kid was gone.

Little Johnny went to the neighbors and said, "I'm sorry to hear that your child has gone missing."

Why were ET's eyes so big?

Because he saw the phone bill.

Hey guess what...

What...

My penis is big.

What's big and yellow and can't swim? A bus filled with children.

What is big, black, and hairy? It's a gorilla with a machine gun.

Joe Biden is the first president in history to have a vice president on record claiming they believed sexual harassment allegations against him.

I don't know about you, but I think that's a pretty big elephant in the room!

To start, I'm a big fella in size.

I saw a skinny guy act like Santa, so I went over to him. "You can't pull that off," I said. He said, "Then you try it." He gave me the Santa suit, and I dressed up. He walked by and saw me with 45 kids in line to sit on my lap and tell me what they wanted for Christmas.

Big penis.

Are you made of gold, titanium, sulfur, titanium, and carbon?

Cuz you’re looking a little big Au Ti S Ti C.

What's the best thing about Switzerland? The flag is a big plus.

My penis is big and long, what else is... my condom... cucumber.

How is sex like air?

It’s not a big deal unless you aren’t getting any.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Mama.

Big Mama. Big Mama can't fit through the door.

Huggy Wuggy big big Huggy Wuggy big big big big Huggy Wuggy laugh laugh smooch smooch Huggy Wuggy *insert clapping noise*

What do Marshall Tucker Band and Kobe Bryant have in common?

Their last big hit was "Fire on the Mountain."