Behavior jokes

Why are all fat people bad drivers?

They are all hungover.

Is it just me, or everybody has a dark side, like a psycho side, and then you act like crazy for some reason?

What's the difference between crazy people and regular people?

We don't live in their heads.

Why can’t you trust an emo kid?

'Cause they always leave you hanging.

I sit because I can't stand you.

Why aren't dogs good at dancing? Cuz they have 2 left feet!

What’s the hardest part about being friends with a turtle?

Getting them to come out of their shell.

You are annoying lolllllllll.

A teacher says to her class one day, "Whoever answers my next question can go home."

A boy throws his bag out the window.

The teacher asks, "Who just threw that?"

The boy says, "Me! I’m going home now."

"I only eat food on the right of my plate."

"Are you good at eating?"

"I'm alright at eating."

To spite Santa and Greta Thunberg, I'm burning the coal I got for Christmas.

There was a very lazy person. He saw a banana peel in front of him while he was walking... and he said: “Oh God, protect me from falling!”

Yo mama so dumb, she put a watch in a piggybank and said she was saving time.

What did Ahsan do?

Meow meow.

When I was recently standing in front of a huge puddle with my buddy, I remembered how he tricked me a week ago. So I tricked him...

I’m always the first person in line at school for lunch.

I just cut everyone.

Monkeys are big, but they sure can swing very lightly.

How do you know if you’ve walked into a sex addicts' counselling session?

The psychologist will thank you for coming.

How do cats relieve themselves in front of people? By licking their puss.

How do you get a monkey off the wall?

You jerk him off!