What did the airplane say to the tower? Allahu Akbar!
Aviation Jokes
Can you tell me the real answer to this joke?
What do you call a drone that takes the long way around?
Jerry: My dad got into a fight on a plane.
Jeremy: That's just *plane* crazy!
Chesley, in horror, runs out of the cockpit of the plane coming from London, "I'm so very sorry, everyone. I punched the wrong buttons, and we are heading to DC instead of New York, and we are about to run out of fuel." He opens the door and turns around to the five passengers and exclaimed, "I've parachutes but miscounted. We only got four for the passengers." He jumps off.
Donald faced the other four and orders:
"I'm the greatest leader of the world, and I'll make the decision. Tony, you go first. Our country needs you. The whole wide world needs you. Pandemic is raging."
Tony jumps off.
"Francis, my friend, you go next. Pandemic is ravaging the mind and body of millions. Their soul needs saving. Save Vladimir's and Xi's for me."
Francis jumps off.
Hillary faced Donald furiously. "Who are you to make decisions for us? I should have been president. I'm the smartest woman in the whole world in history."
Hillary jumps off.
Donald gazed at the young woman and started talking: "I'm an old man. I have already lived a full life - beautiful wives, children, just a beautiful life. Just beautiful. I've become president of the most powerful country, the most beautiful, the richest. Regrets? I've made a few but did it my way. Greta, go on. Your future is bright. I just wish I can make my country great again and have the chance to help save the world with you. I believe in second chances. Look at my bankruptcies, believe me. And I wish I've played more golf and..."
Greta interjected, "Just shut the f* up. The plane is about to crash. Let's go and save the world. The smartest woman in history took my backpack!"
When you throw paper at a hill, you can say, "Hey, look, it is like Kobe's helicopter!"
Yo mama so fat that when she attempted suicide, she bounced to Area 51.
I hate airplanes!
A blonde crashes an airplane.
Officer: Could you please explain to me what happened?
Woman: It got so cold in the plane, I turned the fan off.
Officer: *face palms self*
Also officer: Here's your sign.
I heard Kobe was writing a book about helicopters, but it just wouldn't land with people...
I know, I'm going to hell!
What is a plane ✈️ that can not fly?
A fake one ☝️
What is your car you cannot drive? A super flying car!
What do you call an airplane that doesn’t fly?
A plane wingless.
"I like planes."
- Plane Guy
Why couldn’t most people remember 9/11?
Because it flew over their heads.
Chuck Norris doesn't fly on airplanes.
Airplanes fly on Chuck Norris.
I wonder why the plane got bigger and bigger, then it hit me.
My uncle died in the 9/11 attacks. He was the best pilot I had ever met.
I don't understand the plane crash at 9/11. My dad was a great pilot!
When a plane is having turbulence, it’s just the pilot shaking the steering.
Give a man a plane ticket and he will fly for a day.
Push a man out of a plane and he will fly for the rest of his life.
