Ass

Ass jokes

Crash

  • I was riding my bike down the road!

    When a car started coming, I started running.

    It put me in a crash with my elbow through my ass! ;)

    Orphan

  • Stop with dumb orphan jokes, you dumb ass people!!!!!!!!!!

    They're not funny one bit, so stop!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Cop

  • What's the difference between a cop and bacon?

    Bacon is full of fat and makes you feel good. A cop is full of shit and will make you feel their hot steamy cock as they ram it up your ass with some justice sprinkled on top.

    Fault

  • I got barred from Weight Watchers today.

    It wasn't my fault; it was the fat ass next to me who spilled her box of Maltesers onto the floor in the middle of the room. All I did was say that it was the funniest game of Hungry Hungry Hippos that I have ever seen.

  • 2
  • Haircut

  • Friends, who's your barber? They mess up big time.

    Me.

    You're just jealous because my dad cuts my hair for free, and you have to be paying 30 dollars just for that short-ass cut.

    Super glue

  • My wife told me to pass her some chapstick, but then I realized she hasn’t talked to me in a month, then remembering I gave her super glue.........ehh I’m done with her big ass mouth.

    Fart

  • What are two things you could call a fart?

    "Gas from the ass" or "Odor from the motor!"