Arms

Arms jokes

What did the blind kid get for Christmas? He hasn’t seen it yet...

What did the kids with no arms get? He doesn’t know, he’s still trying to figure out how to open it. :))))

Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms or legs.

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.

Knock knock.....Who’s there... Not the little boy.

What songs do people with no arms listen to?

None, 'cause they can’t press play.

Johnny had 55 pineapples. He threw three at his friend. How many does he have now?

None, because he was pistol whipped then shot at point blank range with a sawed off shotgun covered in fluoroantimonic acid which burned a hole in his skull causing his brain to melt and rupture nerve cells all over his friends. Then his arms and legs were stuffed into a wheat thresher which was used to harvest the meat of the enslaved children. Then his corpse was molested.

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  • A mom says to her son: "Hey, can you wave to that deaf kid over there?"

    The son: "I don't know, can I?"

    The mom: "May you?"

    The son: "No, I don't have any arms!"

    A dad and his son walk out to the middle of the woods armed only with a shovel and a lantern.

    Son: "Dad, it's creepy out here!"

    Dad: "You're complaining? I'm the one that has to leave the woods alone!"

    "Hi, Mrs. Jackson, can Matt come out and play?"

    "Oh, Johnny, you know Matt doesn't have any arms or legs."

    "I know, we just wanted to use him as third base."

    A man walks into a bar with a slab of concrete under his arm and says, "A beer please! and one for the road!"

    "Why did Susie fall off the swing?" "Because she had no arms."

    "Why couldn’t she get up off the ground?" "Because she had no friends."

    "Knock knock." "Who’s there?" "Not Susie, she’s still on the ground."

    "Where did Susie go when the bomb went off?" "Everywhere."

    "Why couldn’t Susie scratch her leg?" "Because it was in a different body bag."

    "Why did Susie drop her ice cream?" "She was hit by a bus."

    "Why did Susie fall off the swing?" "Someone threw a refrigerator at her."

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  • Why did Suzy fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

    Knock knock. Who’s there? Not Suzy.