Why do some couples make their status "single" after a small argument? Like, I don't put "orphan" after I get into an argument with my family.
A no legged manager runs the nearest pizza place called Your Pizza Is A Joke.
I (J0K35) worked there and this happened...
Manager: WHY ARE THE PINEAPPLES IN THE TRASH?!
Me: Because nobody eats fucking pineapple pizza
Manager: THATS IT! IM KICKING YOU OUT OF THIS PLACE
Me: You can't kick me out
Manager: Why not? Huh?
Me: Because you need legs to kick, and you don't have any.
“You da bomb!” “No, you da bomb!”
In the US, a compliment. In the Middle East, an argument.
Three blondes were taking a walk when they stumbled on some tracks. They argued on what the tracks came from. One of them said “it’s a deer.” The other said it “No it’s a coyote.” The last one was going to give her thoughts, but that was when the train hit them.
what's the difference between a feminist and a knife? one has a point.
I always win arguments against my handicapped girlfriend she cant stand for her self
Man and woman are having a discussion. Woman looks into man's eyes and says, "Honey, you know how I like it when you walk up and stick it in . . . ".
". . . but I love it when Bob walks up and sticks it in".
Divorce is scheduled for next month.
If two vegetarians get into a fight, is it still called a beef?
A brother and a sister always got into fights. One day the brother tells the sister, "your adopted" the sister yells back, "At least they wanted me!"
The toilet having an argument with the toilet paper, the owner of the house had a diarrhea, who's day was more shittier!?🤷♂️💩
When your friend gets involved with someone it affects the friendship when ever a friend of mine has a new girlfriend ,we should say I looked like the person you used to know but I've been modified to survive in this relationship if we have an argument and she's there I might disagree with you I'd rather countinue to see her naked.
Last time i talked to my girlfriend, she was yelling at me to put the hammer down.
My girlfriend told me to stop playing Pokemon as it was childish.
I started thrashing about and roared “You don’t have enough badges to control me!”
I was at my boyfriends house and I thought he was cheating on me and he was on the phone with somebody he said he'd be over there soon. so i asked him if I could see his phone he said no and then we fought about until I seen his gun and because I thought he was lying to me I shot him,went through his phone and his friend was still on the phone.
Why did the cow not want to talk to the other cow? because they had beef with eachother
A random guy yelled at me, "Hey, sl*t!" I walked towards him. "I prefer slit." I said. "Why?" He asked. "You see this wrists?" I spat at him.
My sister argued with me that you can't make a car out of spaghetti, you should have seen her face when I drove pasta
A man was hitting a woman with his d*ck. Someone ran up to the man and said “THATS DOMESTIC VIOLENCE” the man replied with “no, it’s not domestic violence it’s DUMBASS-D*CK VIOLENCE”
"You're da bomb!" "No, you're da bomb!"
In America, a compliment. In the Middle East, an argument.
What did the sand say when it got into a fight with the ocean?
"oh my God, you're such a beach"
