Ares jokes

Me: How many letters are in the alphabet?

That one friend: 11 - T-H-E-- A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T.

What are a doctor's and a WWE fighter's ideas on child abuse?

Doctor's: Don't do it, it does not help. Mood behavior.

WWE fighters: If it can crawl, it can brawl.

Okay class, who can tell me who the fastest readers are?

The pilots of 9/11 went through the Twin Towers, 6 in 3 seconds.

After the school shooting, Joe pretended to be a victim while his sister ate the flesh of the fallen.

The guy who stole my diary just died. My thoughts are with his family.

Hi guys, jokes for sister.

So I was listening to a song about "I hate you, are annoying, sister. I'm small and I'm smart," and when I showed it to her, she killed me, and later I was dancing and crying.

Are you a school? Cause I wanna shoot some kids inside of you.

Yo mama so stupid that she sat on the TV and watched the couch.

We are in a matrix, wake up.

Emo people are like other emo people, they're emo. Laugh now or I'll cut your eyes out. Tee hee!

America and UK are a joke.

A guy says to his dog, "Where are you?" The dog was actually dead, bro.

Roses are red, my pencil is blunt.

A parrot trapped on a roof keeps telling the fire crew to f*ck off!

Priests are priests.

Who can jump the highest?

Emo kids, some are still in the air.

When I found out that 10 billion bowls of soup are consumed each year in AMERICA, I thought to myself, "I thought soup was healthy. Apparently not!"

There are multiple. That’s the joke.

Why are the people that get your order at restaurants called waiters? They don't wait for the food; we wait for the food. They should be called "note takers." They take notes for food.

When an orphan finds out who their parents are, and then finds out they're dead.

Why didn’t the orphan play baseball?

Because I took the bat and swung it at their kneecaps, and now they can’t run. What are they going to do, tell their parents?

What are an orphan's favorite shoes?

White Vans.