Ares jokes

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Everything is black, I can't see, can you?

Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see.

Hey girl, are you a wizard? Because you cast lit in my Final Fantasy!

If you thought other people’s puns are bad, well, you should sea mine.

Wife: I think these pants are getting too small for me!

Husband: Don't worry, maybe you are just bad at laundry.

You’ll parsley believe how many puns I have. Hopefully your funny-bone isn’t broken because these are real rib-ticklers.

Why are fish not sleeping? 'Cause the bed is wet.

Children are so ungrateful nowadays. I got my daughter a bike, but now she’s crying on the floor saying, “I don’t have legs!”

There are days I feel really bad for my Wife. She has to feed me in the same place I take a dump.

She really hates it when I spit my food back out.

Fat girls give the best head because they are hungry and eat the most dick.

Just to an orphan.

Orphan: You're stupid.

You: You're so ugly, it's the reason your parents are dead.

Hi, how are you? Busy, busy today, and I have to...

Games are fun.

Dinosaurs be like:

".......My friends are dead, like bruhhh."

You're American when you go in the bathroom, and you're American when you come out, but what are you when you are still in the bathroom? European (you're-a-peein').

When you are playing Fortnite and you get a big W, reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The third one's for you.

I know that my jokes are never punny but...

"Are you related to Yoda?"

"Because yo-delicious!"

Sailors are coming onto the boardwalk and are met by Colonel Sanders. He asks them, "What is your occupation?" They respond, "We are seamen." So he says, "Well, you better wash up 'cause I'm finger lickin' good!"