Ares jokes

I kicked a soccer ball into a kid in a wheelchair, so we are playing Rocket League.

Why are orphans bad at dad jokes?

Because they don't have a dad to tell them.

Roses are red, violets are violet,

My dad died in 9/11, he was a great pilot!

Why are orphans so sad?

Because every time they swallow, they think... "You should have Mom."

Why are Helen Keller jokes so funny?

Because she’s blind and deaf.

Roses are red.

I have free candy. Get in my van. I have free candy!

Sandwiches are yummy! 😋

Man, we all have the one cool sibling, then the strong sibling, and then you, the one who plays on their iPad or computer all day. Then, when you are on vacation, you are doing nothing at all.

Guys, if you saw a post from someone pretending to be me, don't listen to them.

I'm just going to be out for 3 days, or maybe for a month break. There are a lot of fakers.

Masochists and sadists are made for each other.

Are you a haunted house?

Cuz I am gonna be screaming when I come inside you.

You are so fat you tried to eat the word "edible."

Why are orphans' funerals so small?

They have no loved ones.

To Mr. Nice Guy, you are nice, sweet, and caring! I am so grateful to be your friend!

Why are orphans lucky?

Because when they drive, they don’t need a license plate, because they don’t have a home.

Why are nuts on boys?

Hey, what are those things on your arms? They look like cuts. Wait, what? No, it's just marker. Nothing else...

Orphans are human too! They have parents like all of us, so I don't know why they're saying it's fun to make fun of an orphan. Have you ever been too cold and wondered if your parents are going to have another child and not you? That's not funny! It is %9000,000 NO!!!!!!!!!!

Your mama so fat, Jupiter is smaller than her.

A B C D E F G.

Gummy bears are chasing me, one is red, one is blue. One is chewing up my shoe. Now I'm running for my life because the red one's got a knife!