Ares jokes
If you're reading this, you are Nickel and Gallium......
Ni- ........*something else in between the two halves*................Ga
YOU FUCKING MONKEYS!
You are so fat that the last time you stepped on the weighing scale, the doctor said, "I want your weight and not [your] phone number."
When your friends [are] talking about sports:
Jake says, "It was 17.56M people watching [the] basketball championship."🦁
Sam says, "It was 113M people watching the Super Bowl." 😯🐱
Avion says, "It was up from 1.12 billion people watching [the] World Cup." 😶🙀
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I saw your mom beat you.
Your wife dumped you because you are so poor and you are so ugly. You also live under a rock and have no money. You got dumped so hard you can't remember you got dumped.
What do you call two AI systems that are in love with each other? Member of chat LGBT.
Why are Americans bad at chess? They lost their towers.
Do you know why I don't like stairs? They are always up to something. #dadjokes
Hi Mom, how are you doing?
What are twins’ favorite fruit?
Pairs 🍐.
If you ever get mad at an orphan, punch them in the face... What are they going to do, tell their parents?
My god, my egg jokes are eggcellent!
Two skeletons meet at the graveyard at noon.
"What the heck are you doing here?"
"I couldn't sleep."
Girls with the name Beoni are white.
I still remember my granddad's last words,
"Are you still holding the ladder?"
It's really great that you can make fun of orphans, 'cause what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
People's music when friends are around: *rock*
When they are gone: "Come on, vamanos, everybody let's go!"
What is similar between a ton of kids and some boxes?
Both of those are commonly found in basements.
Isn't it sad that orphans are only allowed self raising flour? Orphan-👁👄👁
Family are together playing charades.
Me: "50 Shades of Grey!" Yes, I'm so good at charades! Put your shirt back on, Nan!