Ares jokes

Don't touch my pickles - they are very picklish.

Orphan jokes are like families, not everyone gets 'em.

(Also, I banged ya mum ;))

If you ever get bored, just hit an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

There's something special about cemeteries.

People are dying to get inside.

Blood is red.

Bruises are blue. I forget the rest... um, I hate you...?

If you read this, you fucked your dad and your 4-year-old sister, you sick fuck... At least wait till they are 15.

A lawyer bought a beautiful yacht. He invited the law firm to come aboard for a great weekend.

Saturday night was the candle light dinner and Sam drank too much, walked on the deck and fell over the rail into the water and was calling for help. Tom said, "Oh no, the sharks will get him." All of the party lined along the rail and noticed the sharks were swimming around him in a circle. Jim said, "The sharks are not even bothering him!" And a shark lifted up his head out of the water and said, "Professional Courtesy."

Is it bad to hit an orphan?

What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

Well... I mean, they could go to church and try to gather that someone hit them.

A sibling went up to their other sibling and said, "Dad said you're adopted."

The other sibling said, "You are, too."

Then the first sibling goes, "No, I'm not."

And the sibling says, "We're twins."

The other kid goes, "And you're adopted... oh."

You are the joke.

All trucks are monster trucks if you’re afraid of trucks.

Eggs are so egg-cellent that they are sunny-side up.

Me and my mom order Chinese food. So when it came, my mom grabbed the egg roll and started to suck it down. Then I ask my mom what are you doing. Then my mom says, "I love you for 5 dollar."

How long are you? I

What did one ankle say to the other? Good morning, how are you today?

"Harry Hicks smells of home. Homo is an infection, and infections are made up of atoms."

If you are ever mad, punch an orphan.

What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

Hi, how are you today?

5 Little Monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said... "Wait, why are there mines all over the floor?"

What are you doing, son? It has been an hour, and you are still in front of the mirror closing your eyes.

Mum, actually I want to see how I look while sleeping...