Are jokes

Why are Americans bad chess players?

They lost 2 towers.

I’ll never forget my Granddad’s last words to me just before he died.

“Are you still holding the ladder?”

Why are Japanese always so skinny?

Cause last time there was a fat man, an entire city disappeared.

If you ever get mad, just hit an orphan.

What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

The little camel asks his mother: "Mum, why do we have these big humps?"

"Because in these humps there is some water, and in the hot desert we can drink."

"And Mum, why do we have this large fur?"

"Because the desert at night is so cold, and then we don’t feel cold."

"And Mum, why do we got these big hoofs?"

"Because the desert sand is hot, and the hoofs save us from the hot sand."

"But Mum, what the fuck are we doing here in the national zoo?"

My syndrome may be down, but my hopes are always up.

Why do mermaids wear seashells?

They are too big for “B” shells, and too small for “D” shells.

JFK: Are you a bullet? Because I can't get you out of my head.

Why are there more female history teachers than male?

Because women like to bring up the past.

There are only 2 things I hate in this world:

1. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures. 2. The French.

All aboard the Magic School Bus! We are going to New York. The second tower has been hit.

Why do they call my dick section 8?

Because all the hoes are on it.

Roses are red. Watches are gold. Get on your knees and do what you're told.

I asked my Dad the other day, "At what age is it okay to have sex with girls?"

He replied, "When they leave school, son, they are legal."

Apparently, 3:15 p.m. is not what he meant.

Why are orphans bad at poker? Because they don't know what a full house is.

I went over to a crying child and said, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working at an orphanage!

Girls are like rocks, the flat ones get skipped.

me: calls suicide hotline. hotline lady: suicide hotline, how are you doing today? me: not much, just hanging.

What does the Bartles and Jaymes wine cooler television ad have in common with ministers who are white Christian nationalists?

They both thank you for your financial support.

Are you a bullet? Because I can't get you out of my head.