Tyler is ugly.
If you are called Tyler, change your name.
Your hair is receding more than people do when they smell you.
What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?
"If we don't get some support soon, people will start to think we are balls."
"(My beard actually connects.)" "Like the connection you never had with your father."
Your forehead and your hairline must be great friends, because they go way back.
You're so fat, you drank an invisibility potion, and everyone could still see you!
You're pretty, pretty dumb.
What am I if my neck is covered in red bumps, my ears are the size of a giant corn cob, my skin is ruby red, my eyes are bloodshot, I have green skin, and fur growing all over my body? Horribly ugly.