Appearance jokes

Yo mama is so ugly, when she went for plastic surgery, they accidentally gave her face a Brazilian Butt Lift!

I met a fat chick at the beach.

People started asking me what I use for bait, or do you want us to help throw the whale back in the water?

I suggested to my girlfriend that she would look sexier with her hair back.

Apparently, that’s insensitive to someone during chemo.

Imagine if a ninja got a low taper fade.

How many belly rolls does Explain Bear have?

Don't listen to people when they say you have a dad bod. You don't.

You have a father figure.

Roses are red, violets are blue, You told me I'm ugly, nah, you look like a monkey!

You will find Taylor Swift on the streets before you find your hairline.

Someone told me I looked gay today. I told him that my clothes just came out of the closet this morning.

Your hairline is so far gone that you could build a runway.

My grandad and your hairline go way back.

Roses are red, violets are blue. I thought Voldemort was ugly, then I saw you.

Your hairline's so ugly, it turned Medusa to stone!

Yo mama is so ugly that her portraits hang themselves.

Wow, you did 10 chin-ups? Was it 1 for each chin?

Yo mama so fat when someone asked her to touch her chin, she asked, "Which one?"

Yo mama so ugly that when Hello Kitty saw her, she said, "Goodbye!"

Yo mama so hairy that the zookeepers called a code red thinking an ape got loose.

Bro, is your hairline and your forehead good friends because they go way back?

Your hair line is curved like a moving train.