ANS jokes
if an atom makes up everything im still suprised how it made ur mom
A guy in a Costco was pretty pissed off at something. A guy walks up to him and says, "What's wrong, pal? Don't worry, it's not like you're on an abandoned aisle!"
Logic fire bars in Fortnite sped up to sound like he [is a] chipmunk like Alvin, Simon, and Theodore :)
Why can’t an orphan hit a home run? Because he doesn’t have a home.
Just to an orphan.
Orphan: You're stupid.
You: You're so ugly, it's the reason your parents are dead.
What time is it when a rooster sits on a fence? Morning.
What time is it when an elephant sits on a fence? Time to get a new fence.
What time is it when a lawyer sits on the fence? Time for an elephant to sit on the fence.
I don't want to date an alien.
Why can’t an orphan celebrate Father’s Day and Mother’s Day? Because they have no parents.
What do you call an @EB with no ears?
An Explain B.
What does a crooked lawyer who is not on the ACLU payroll have in common with a crooked politician who has an office in Washington, DC?
They both sign their names using a blue pen 🖊 🖊.
Your hairline is so far back, a pilot thought it was an airplane.
Why won't an American atheist convert to the religion of Islam in the city of Dearborn, Michigan?
Because being on the sex offender list is the only requirement to be able to join a mosque in the city of Dearborn, Michigan.
What kind of fish knows how to do an appendectomy? A sturgeon!
What's a zebra? A couple sizes bigger than an A.
How many tickles does it take to tickle an octopus?
Tentacles!
How do you cook an alligator? With a croc-pot.
I dated a girl, and I didn’t know she was previously in an abusive relationship.
I thought she just REALLY hated high-fives.
What’s the first thing you should do if an epileptic is having a seizure in the bathtub?
Throw in your dirty laundry!
Why does an orphan commit a crime?
Because it wants to be wanted.
A child's parents once lived in Chicago.
I wonder why he's in an orphanage now.