ANS jokes
What do we call a family photograph of an orphan?
A selfie.
Why did the rapper become an archaeologist?
Because he wanted to dig for old-school beats!
What do you get when you cross a rapper with an accountant?
Someone who COUNTS BARS all day!
What do you call your retard friend?
A homie with an extra cromie.
What instrument does a special ed kid play? An autistic guitar.
Do you know when an African doesn't feel hungry?
When he is dead.
What activity do nuns and whores have in common?
Answer: Genuflection.
Yo hairline is so long, when you looked in a mirror you saw an entire endangered species.
When you got on an airplane, the flight attendant asked which hairline you were flying with.
What's the difference between a bird and an emo?
Birds fly.
What do you call an Irish person having a seizure? A Shamrock Shake.
An orphan walked up to St. June's Family Hospital.
Doctor: "Sorry kid, you can't be in here."
My nephew hated working outside in landscaping, so I got him a job in the twin towers; I don't know why he keeps complaining about it being an inside job.
Yo momma's an ICE agent!
Why do you need an AR-15?
So my son can use it if he's being bullied at school.
The penis has a sad life. His hair is always a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor is an asshole, his best friend is a pussy, and his owner beats him.
He also stands up for kids who can't defend themselves.
Danny just bought a new game from Steam for a penny.
About one hour later, Danny asks his mother: "Mom, I am not able to start the game."
Mom asked, "Why?"
Danny answers: "It says 'Press any key' on the screen, but I can't find an 'Any' button on my keyboard."
I went to help an amputated girl, but she didn't have a hand for me to grab.
When I finished playing my guitar, I noticed an amputee in the crowd not giving me a round of applause.
What happens to an Indian's doorbell when you ring it?
A ring-a-ding-a-ding.