ANS jokes
Why can't people in Africa have medicine?
Because you cannot have pills on an empty stomach.
I recently became the coach of an orphanage baseball team.
Because I hate dealing with parents.
I'm holding an African themed party tomorrow. There is no food, and the drinks are 10 miles away!
What's the difference between an orphan and a Chinese kid?
The Chinese kid has a home.
What do you call an orphan family photo?
A selfie.
Three Europeans head to an island. They are captured by the island people. They are going to kill them, and they plead. They grant them a chance to live. The island people tell them to grab a fruit from the tribe's garden and bring it back, then to follow the task at hand.
The first guy brings back a peach. The island leader says, "Stick it up your ass. If you laugh, you die." The first guy shoves it up his ass and laughs, so they kill him. The second guy brings a grape, he does the same and laughs, making them kill him.
The first two are in heaven together. "Peaches are fuzzy, so I laughed. How the hell did you die? You had a grape!" says the first guy. The second guy replied, "It didn't tickle at all. I laughed at the sight [of] the third guy was bringing over a pineapple."
Why are there no pharmacies in Africa?
Because you can't have medicine on an empty stomach.
They say give a man an inch, he'll take a mile. What about women? They don't have dicks.
My friend thinks he is smart. He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a coconut at his face.
If you're bored, just go hit an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
I asked the Titanic an icebreaker question.
It couldn't answer.
What do you call a kid hanging? An emo kid!
Why can't an orphan get 5 stars in GTA? Because they are not wanted.
Why can't an orphan be a criminal? Because they are not wanted.
There's a new Michael Jackson biopic in the works. There is a possibility that we will know who his love interest was.
What we know so far: Billie Jean is not his lover, and that kid [seen with him] is not his son. We also know that Michael Jackson said that sharing his bed with little boys is "healing" and an act of "sharing the love," so take that as you will.
Why is the record for longest jump kept by an emo?
They're still hanging.
What can an elevator do that an orphan’s parents can’t?
The elevator can raise a family.
How are an orphan and baseball different from each other?
A baseball game has a home run.
what does an orphanage and a hospital have in common?
people go there to fix their mistakes.
Why can't an orphan get married? It doesn't have its parents' blessing.