ANS jokes
"The rise of atheism is going to lead to a break down of social morals and lead to all kinds of filth, including an increase in child abuse," said the village priest.
The village scientists did some fact checking. In prison, they found roughly 70% of child abusers were hyper religious before committing the crimes, and another 20% converted to religions to look 'remorseful'. The remaining 10% preferred not to say. They presented the findings to the media.
"Scientists slander good religious folk and ignore the weight of evidence!"
"Is Science biased against religion? You decide in this survey," they reported.
The village priest is living at his majesty's convenience and tells the others he committed armed robbery.
"Why is this a joke? It's not even funny!" said the person reading this, breaking the forth wall.
What is funny is you got to the end of this post and didn't cringe. Why not?
What is an orphan's favorite Marvel movie?
"Spider-Man: No Way Home."
What do you call an orphan when they eat a meal? A family dinner.
An orphan boy at my school did really badly on a test and started crying. I said, “Don’t worry, your parents won’t say anything.”
What's an orphan's least favorite meme? "Family."
What's the difference between a puppy and an orphan?
Puppies get adopted.
What is an orphan's least favorite store? Home Depot.
What does a pedophile call an orphanage?
A supermarket.
Why did the orphan stop playing baseball?
Because baseball has a home, and an orphan does not.
Laugh now.
I don't know what an HD is, but my doctor says I have 80 of 'em'.
What do me and an emo kid have in common:
We both like to hang.
If you're ever bored, try scaring the sh*t out of an Asian to see their eyes open for the first time.
Why can't an orphan hit a home run?
He's got no home to run to.
What do you get when you mix a cow with an earthquake??
Milkshake.
What's an astronaut's favorite game? Space-ball!
What happens when the Twin Towers breathe? They collapse like an orphan with stage 4 cystic fibrosis who lives in the streets of Africa.
An emo girl dyed her hair red.
Where does her hairline start? Her wrist.
Bored? Run over an orphan with your car! What are they going to do, tell their nonexistent parents?
A cow is an earthquake, it's a milkshake.
An orphan walks into a shop but gets lost, so he calls his mum but then remembers.