ANS jokes
What type of alphabet does an elf learn?
The elf-abet.
So a girl says, "You're so ugly to me," and she says, "I’m the prettiest girl." I say, "Yeah, a pretty girl for an ogre 👹!"
An orphan goes up to someone. The guy says, "Where are your parents?"
The orphan says, "Why do you think I'm wearing ripped pyjamas?"
Why did the number 5 get voted out of the game in the 1st round? Because he was an odd man out!
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special Forces.
I just took an orange soda bath this morning. The next thing I knew, it turned out to be a river of Orange Crush.
What do you call an ant with so much power?
A ter-mite.
What do you call an injured person who doesn't want to play a game with you? A sore loser.
Why do orphans like milk so much?
Because they got no milk as a baby.
What’s the difference between an apple and a depressed kid? The apple falls from the tree.
Why can’t an orphan play games with a full house in them? Because they don’t know what a full house is.
When the teacher dismissed the class to go home,
The orphan asked, "Where do I go?"
The teacher replied, "Home."
The orphan said, "Catch me on the streets then!"
Why can’t you trust an emo kid?
'Cause they always leave you hanging.
What do you call an orphan with a selfie?
A family portrait.
What do you call an orphan taking a picture?
A self-portrait.
I saw a little boy begging for money.
I said, "Are you an orphan?"
He said, "Yes, what gave me away?"
I said, "Your parents!"
The other day my mom called me a retard.
I'm now an orphan.
I saw a kid crying, so I asked them where their parents were.
God, I love working at an orphanage!
So, a guy is evading the draft. The cops bang on his door, and he runs out the back, through an alleyway onto a road. He finds a nun and asks if he can hide under her blouse. She complies, and the cops walk by and don't see them. The man comes back up from under the nun's blouse and says, "Hey man, you've got a pair of balls!" The nun says, "I didn't wanna be drafted either..."
Why did the director have an injured leg? Cause he couldn't find the right cast.