ANS jokes

I just took an orange soda bath this morning. The next thing I knew, it turned out to be a river of Orange Crush.

What do you call an ant with so much power?

A ter-mite.

What do you call an injured person who doesn't want to play a game with you? A sore loser.

What’s the difference between an apple and a depressed kid? The apple falls from the tree.

Why can’t an orphan play games with a full house in them? Because they don’t know what a full house is.

Why can’t you trust an emo kid?

'Cause they always leave you hanging.

What do you call an orphan with a selfie?

A family portrait.

What do you call an orphan taking a picture?

A self-portrait.

I saw a little boy begging for money.

I said, "Are you an orphan?"

He said, "Yes, what gave me away?"

I said, "Your parents!"

The other day my mom called me a retard.

I'm now an orphan.

I saw a kid crying, so I asked them where their parents were.

God, I love working at an orphanage!

So, a guy is evading the draft. The cops bang on his door, and he runs out the back, through an alleyway onto a road. He finds a nun and asks if he can hide under her blouse. She complies, and the cops walk by and don't see them. The man comes back up from under the nun's blouse and says, "Hey man, you've got a pair of balls!" The nun says, "I didn't wanna be drafted either..."

I'm jealous of my LED lights, 'cause they're hanging from the ceiling and I'm not.

Why did the director have an injured leg? Cause he couldn't find the right cast.

Whenever you see an orphan taking a selfie, photo bomb him and say, "Family photo!"

Your mom wants to tell you that you're adopted, but you were an orphan.

What is an orphan's favorite video game?

"Who's Your Daddy?"

My friend put an action toy and called it Kobe and put it on a drone. I realized that my friend didn't know how to fly a drone.

Yo mama is so ugly, when she tried to join an ugly contest, they said, "Sorry, no professionals!"

So one day a boy was at his dad's work when another little boy ran in crying. Then the dad said, "Aw, little boy, are you lost? Where's your parents?" And the little boy at his dad's work said, "OMG! Dad, you can't say that!"

Why can't he say that?

Answer: He works at an orphanage.