ANS jokes

Our teacher told us to write a story about the life of an object that's not alive, so I wrote a story about an emo kid.

My ex was an orphan as a child.

I should have taken that as the first sign.

If her parents didn’t want her, why would I?

An orphan boy at my school did really bad in a test and started crying.

I said, “Don’t worry, your parents won’t say anything.”

Best way to trick your friends:

A brick falls out of a plane.

How do you put an elephant in the fridge? Open the door, put him in, and close the door.

How do you put a giraffe in the fridge? Open the door, take the poor elephant out, put the giraffe in, and close the door.

The animal kingdom is throwing a party, all the animals are there except for one, who? The giraffe, because he's still in the fridge.

Sally needs to cross the river that is known to be filled with deadly crocodiles, but she crossed safely, how? Because the crocodiles are at the party, but Sally still dies after crossing the river, how? Because she was hit by the flying brick.

Customer: "Can I get this in a smaller size and a different color?"

Employee: "Ma'am, this is an adoption agency, you can't do that here!"

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  • I was walking today and I saw an emo with a noose looking up at a tree. I simply said, "Hang on there, bud!"

    How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?

    You tell it to clap until his/her parents are back.

    Orphan: Wanna have a sleepover?

    Friend: But you're an orphan.

    Orphan: Just wanted a place to sleep tonight!

    I made a website for orphans. Unfortunately, it doesn’t have a home page.

    Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.

    Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father.

    Why do orphans love boomerangs? Because they come back.

    Why was the orphan so successful? When they told him go big or go home, he only had one option.

    What’s the only advantage of being an orphan? Nobody makes jokes about yo mamma.

    An apple and an emo are at the top of a tree, they both fall at the same time.

    Who hit the ground first?

    The apple won because the emo had forgotten to connect the internet.