Animal jokes
Person: "My pony is crazy; it's always horsing around."
What do you call the ghost of a chicken? A poultrygeist!
What's every elderly person's spirit animal? The blue tang fish.
I like tortles.
What happened to the dog that crossed the road?
Chihuahua?
What should I call a burger?
A cow burger.
Why do orphans like cows?
Because when they leave, they bring back the milk.
What do you get when you mix a cow with an earthquake??
Milkshake.
What do you call a mouse with sneakers?
Squeakers!
Where did the cows go to a date?
To the moo-vies!
Your mum is so fat, when the doctors did her x-ray, the doctor said to her, "I want your x-ray, not an elephant's x-ray!"
How does a cow become invisible? -- Through camooflage.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Grounded beef.
What's a fish without eyes?
A fsh.
The fish do nothing. That is definitely a bad joke.
How do you turn your dog into a watchdog?
Get it a Rolex!
What do you call a cow?
A cow!
When I was 11, my mom came home from the bar super drunk that night, and I just wanted to know if they knew where the cat was because I heard a noise. We had a loooooooong talk the next morning.
What do you call a cow with stuff growing on it? Moscow.