And jokes

How are genders and the Twin Towers alike?

There was 2, now it's a sensitive subject.

What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?

The apple gets picked.

I posted up on my story that I got a new cut. My friends and family called the cops...

I used to be emo.

He was saying jokes, and someone said, "You are on a roll!"

My grandfather has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the National Zoo.

I was digging a hole in the garden when I found some gold coins.

I was about to run and tell my wife when I remembered why I was digging a hole in the garden...

What do you call a dude that is always high and gets higher than everyone else in the family? The alpha pothead!

What's the difference between Monday and a dick?

They're not different. They're both unnecessarily long and hard.

How did 10 die?

Because it was in between 9 and 11.

What's the similarity between gay men and an ambulance?

They both take it in the back and go woop woop.

Suicide really isn't something to joke about, unless it's hanging yourself.

It's a really quicker way to die, and less blood spilled for your mother to clean up.

You think on a airplane when a muslim guy gets on, people look at him and think... "Aw, fuck."

What's the difference between a golf ball and a G-spot?

A man will actually look for the golf ball.

What do genders and the Twin Towers have in common?

There used to be two, but now it's a touchy subject.

Who is older than the Twin Towers?

Billy Bob the 1th. He was older than the Twin Towers. He was born 3 minutes before the Twin Towers and is still alive today.

What’s the difference between an orphan and Pikachu?

Pikachu, I choose you!

Q: What do the mob and pussy have in common?

A: One slip of the tongue and you're in deep shit.

What do the Nicaraguan Contras, Crips, and Crack have in common? The CIA.

Papyrus was playing with the human, but then Papyrus fell and he broke the cell bone of the human.

What’s big and black on the road?