And jokes

What's the difference between an orphan dying and a bag of groceries being dropped?

While most agree that both are unfortunate, people actually care when they drop their groceries.

"Dez nuts, bell suck and she ugly."

I have no toes, so I put blood on my foot, and then my other foot got run over, so, ye.

Orphans are human, too! They just don't know who their parents are or where! I know four sisters named Mariah, Kariah, Lariah, and Iariah and they said they are orphans, too! And they are sad and they don't like your jokes!

Orphan joke protest! Orphans are nice and kind, so stop joking about them!

Sign a comment and put me or anything else to protest about!

Good luck, Jake.

This one butt cheek said to the other one, "It's really personal, but it's okay, I'll tell you." It said, "Hey, let's go to my crib so we can smoke a little joint, watch a movie, and go upstairs in the room and get down."

A Mexican is drunk and he has a passenger in the car, and the passenger asked, "Where are we going?"

The Mexican says, "I'm not driving, the drunk guy is."

What is the difference between a human and a magic dog night?

What is your car? What was your time today after I had dinner night and night sleep night? Is it a night for you and a dinner night? Night dinner night? Was the snow? I had dinner night night dinner.

Your nana gay, just like you, and you're made of atoms, nerd.

A priest, a minister, a rabbi and an imam walk into a bar.

The bartender looks at them and says, "Is this a joke?"

Time for double joke Tuesday.

What is a bird's favorite letter?

A C gull.

So I won a round of CSGO with my team, then on VC, some kid trash talked me.

Kid: You're a dick, you know!

Me: And you're a pussy, you know?

I am a fruitcake. Why? Because I’m fruity and nutty. That’s the joke. Tada!

Girl: Can we visit Grandma this weekend?

Mother: Sure.

Five-year-old: Look mommy! Two people and they're wearing rope necklaces!

What do you call a mosquito in your language?

We don't call them, they just come and bite.

You, I didn’t see you there. The pizza place is hunted bad, so you are scared 😱😱😱😱 and so you run and you see your grandma, and you were happy again forever and ever ha ha so funny 😁. The end or is it bye-bye?

What's the difference between a bird and jam?

You can ham your cock in a bird, but you can't bird your cock in a jam.

My name is Caleb, and I like boo and eat it.

What is the difference between a human and a tree?

A human can walk and a house can walk to a tree, walk home, walk, walk, and walk, walk.

A person walks into the bar and said, "Hey barman, get my son a drink and tell him his dad is dead."

Who said that?