Absence

Absence jokes

Dad

Me: "You wanna see my dad?"

Some kid: "Yeah?"

Me: "Close your eyes and he will appear."

Some kid: "He ain't appearing."

Me: "Sorry I thought he would appear for you. He won't appear for me."

*The kid laughs*

Moral: Not everything is supposed to be funny text if you notice what was really going on. 🙃

Orphan

Why can’t orphans have sex? Because they have no one to call "daddy."

Swing

Why did Sarah call off the swing? Because she has no arms.

Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

Word

I will always remember my dad's last words...

Oh wait, I've never heard them.

Orphan

What do you call it when an orphan takes a photo of himself?

A family photo.

Dad

I hope you have to dip your Oreos in water because your dad never came back with the milk.

Orphan

Why can’t orphans have sex?

Because they don’t have a daddy to run back to.

Orphan

These orphan jokes would leave them crying to their mommies if they had any.

Orphan

Why can't orphans be gay?

Because they don't have anyone to call "daddy."