Absence jokes
I walked to the milk store and did not see my dad.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple has a family tree.
When you're the only one bullying the weird kid and you're absent on the day he shoots up the school. ̄\_(ツ)_/ ̄
Why are orphans bad at hide and seek?
Because they can’t find their parents.
Bruh, people always makin' jokes 'bout how their dad left, well in my story it was the mum that needed milk.
Kid: Your mom!
Orphan: (cries)
The "f" in "orphan" stands for "amily." There is no "f."
Why do orphans eat cereal with water? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
Boomerangs come back, but your dad never did.
Ur mom.
Oh wait, you don't have one.
What do you call an orphan family tree?
A tree stump.
Did you know that the "F" in orphan stands for family?
My dad left me, lol.
What are orphans' favorite sports team? The home team.
We have a new member of staff here today. He has no arms, no legs, and no body. He will be known as "The Head."
What is a selfie of an orphan called?
A family photo.
You're like a cloud. When you go away, it's a beautiful day.
Why are there only 363 days on an orphan's calendar?
They don't have Father's Day and Mother's Day.
How come an orphan can't work for SC Johnson?
Because it's a family company.
Why can't orphans go to family restaurants?
Because they don't have a family to go with.