Absence jokes
Did you know an orphan is deeply religious because they can finally call someone "father."
What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can't be found.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't run home.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't go to home plate.
Boy 1: "Sonic is a fictional character."
Boy 2: "Yeah, just like your dad."
Your hairline's so bad, your dad went to get the milk and never came back. Years later, he comes back and says, "Go get a hairline, boy."
What does my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can't be found.
I have a stepladder because my real ladder left when I was 5.
My mom loves balls.
But my dad has been gone for the last 4 years.
How do you know when a joke has turned into a dad joke?
When it leaves you and never comes back.
What do you call an orphan taking a picture of themself?
A family photo.
Why are orphans bad at baseball? Because they can't hit home runs.
What did the girl and the orphan have in common? Their parents weren't home.
Ur mum—oh wait, you don't have that.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Because their dad never came back with milk.
What do orphans call their parents? Unicorns, because they don't exist.
What is the difference between you and an orphan?
Orphans have zero family.
Why do orphans only have 363 days of the year?
Because they don't have a Mother's and Father's Day.
Why can't orphans see their parents?
Because they don't have one!
Why do orphans have water with their cereal?
Their dad didn't come back with the milk.