Worst Jokes Ever
Little Johnny went to the doctor to get an infection checked on his penis. As the doctor examined it, he asked, "Lil Johnny how did you get an infection on your penis?" Johnny replied, "Well, the damn neighbor Sally's braces are too sharp."
Them: "You're ugly."
Me: "No, as ugly as your extra chromosome."
I bought shoes from a drug dealer yesterday. I don't know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day.
Yo mama's so stupid that she studied for her eye test.
What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? I can't peanut butter my dick up your ass.
Why did the legless kid think he won a race?
Because everybody already left.
What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on juan.
What's better than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree?
One dead baby nailed to ten!
Is it just me, or when you wipe your ass too deep, it reminds you of your uncle? Just me?
I still remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. He said, “Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?”
When I was little, I would pray to Jesus every night for him to get me a new bike. I learned one week in Sunday school that that's not how it works, so instead I just stole one and asked him for forgiveness.
What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
Why do people not play Uno with Mexicans? Because they are always stealing the green cards.
What is a frog's favorite drink?
Croaka-cola!
What do you get when you insert human DNA into a goat? Banned from the petting zoo!
What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.
Yo mama's so fat, her blood type is Coca-Cola!
Chuck Norris can pick an apple from an orange tree and make the best lemonade you've ever tasted.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite meal?
His shoulder.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was emotionally distressed after a break up and wanted to find some help at his friend's pen. In the end, he was run over by a car, marking a sad end to what might have been a good chicken's life.