Worst Jokes Ever
Once I was asked to perform snail jokes at a stand-up comedy night. I certainly snailed it because the crowd thought it was shellerious.
Yo mama's so poor, the ducks throw bread at her.
How does a train dance?
It bogies!
What's the slowest train in the world? A slow coach!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Not your.
Not your who?
Not your mama!
Why does an orphan go to church?
So they can call someone "father."
I was fuming when I lost my job as a window cleaner, like who built the Twin Towers anyway?
How do emos like their meat cooked?
Medium rawr.
Son: Mom, what's dark humor?
Mom: Do you see that man without arms over there? Tell him to clap.
Son: Mom, I’m blind.
Mom: Exactly.
I got jealous when my phone died.
Why can't an orphan get caught on the hub? They have no parents to catch them.
You want to know what annoying people and dogs have in common.
The female ones are called "bitch."
My mom told me we were flying to a building to see my aunt. I wondered, "Are we about to relive 9/11?"
The circular saw asked the chainsaw, "When am I as big as you?"
The chainsaw would answer with, "When you cut down some things in your life. Like your owner."
The circular saw would reply with, "What?"
This joke here is the worst.
Why can't orphans bake?
They don't have milk.
My mum told me to take you to the zoo and throw you in the lake, but I couldn't find you.
Yo mama so fat, you deported herself.
Why did Stephen Hawking not believe in God?
Computers don’t really have a specific religion.
See the lies.