Worst Jokes Ever
Your mama is so fat that she took a picture at Christmas, and it's still downloading.
Why aren't emos and trees friends? Because the tree leaves them hanging.
My doctor gave me one year to live, so I shot him. The judge gave me 15. Problem solved!
Why did the emo kid hate the tree?
It left him hanging.
Why do orphans like water?
Cuz they drink it ;)
Random Kid: Aye man where was Kobe flying to?
Launch Site: Umm, he might have gone too close to here, sorry if he might have crashed...
What bee is terrible at flying? Kobe.
What do depression and suicide have in common?
Nothing, they're both hanging.
Me at the Oscars when I see Jada Pinkett Smith, I said: "G.I. Jane 2, more like G.I. Jada 2, can't wait to see it."
So Will Smith is laughing and then suddenly, Will Smith walks up to me and punches me in the face.
Me: "Ow, oh, wow. Will Smith just smacked the shit out of me.” My nigga Smith goes: "KEEP MY WIFE'S NAME OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MOUTH!" Me: "Maybe you should focus on keeping her friends out of hers."
At school I am always called emo.
Little did they know that emos are wannabe goths.
Q: What do you call a duck that's sad?
A: Idk, but it's acting really duckpressed.
Person: What's your perfect date look like?
Me: Oh, just hanging around in a tree.
Q: I have a fish that can breakdance! A: Only for 20 seconds though, and only once.
A young teen was walking home from school and having a nice day.
She gets home, eats, showers, and heads to her room. The young teen hears her mother say something. Not sure what she said, the girl replies with "ok."
The young teen was gonna head to bed, wondering when her mom was gonna come in and say goodnight. She lays in bed, but then she hears her mom's voice say, "Hunny, I'm home." She doesn't bother to say ok.
Later, when she decides to sleep, she gets a message from her mom saying to unlock the door, that she lost her keys. :)
Everyone makes mistakes. Like my mom, she made a mistake 13 years ago.
I screamed "Jenga" in history class today. We were watching a documentary on 9/11.
Why are Christmas trees banned at the mental hospital?
They would hang themselves like ornaments.
What do the people in heaven that died on the Titanic call the Titanic? The Dietanic.
Dad?
This is not even a joke.