911

911 jokes

Guy

  • A guy stole my car last night. Before dialing 911 I thought, "Fuck it. Let him explain the dead bodies in the trunk."

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  • Karen

  • How many Karens does it take to change a light bulb?

    Just one...to call 911 and demand a cop come do something about the intimidating blackness.

  • 3
  • Orphan

  • Why did the orphan not call 911 when he saw a tower catch fire?

    'Cause he did not want any kids to go through the same pain.

    Reader

  • Who are the fastest readers? The people who were in 9/11. They went through 91 stories in 1.2 seconds.

    Subway

  • Subway trying to commemorate 9/11: CRASH INTO SUBWAY THIS SUBTEMBER 11TH TO GET 2 FOOTLONG SUBS FOR ONLY $9.11, THAT'S 2 FOOTLONG SUBS FOR $9.11 AND WATCH THEM FALL... INTO YOUR MOUTH!

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