911 jokes
Lol, the Twin Towers ordered a drop in from Pizza Hut, but instead they got a hot and ready from Jet's.
Why do 911 jokes always fail?
They always crash and burn!
What kind of birthday cake do you get on September 11th?
Three small ones, so you can have a flight of different cake flavors!
Why were the people during 9/11 mad because they ordered pepperoni sandwiches, but they got two planes?
I love it when cancer hits like a ton of bricks. The best part is when it kills people.
Bro, my friend told me all his humor is dead and dry, and I was like, "Just like 9/11 victims."
The two brothers were sitting next to each other. They played with planes all day long. They got too violent, and now their sister (World Trade Center) stands there. The brothers were put up for adoption, and the planes were given back to their owners.
"911, what’s your emergency?" I asked, listening to the quiet sobs of a little kid on the other end of the line.
“I think my daddy want to kill me,” the girl said and cried, making me freeze on the spot as I recognized my daughter’s voice.
What is the difference between a cow and 9/11?
You can’t milk a cow for 15 years.
What would you do if you see a guy suffocating from the heat? I would call and dial 911, holy shit!
What's it called when an orphan calls 911?
Operator: Hello, is your family okay?
Orphan: I'm an orphan.
Operator: *bruh*
My grandpa was a great pilot, but he died on September 11, 2001.
What's the 9/11 survivors' least favorite team?
New York Jets.
Two hunters are walking in the forest together. Hunter #2 flops down, unconscious, and Hunter #1 dials 911.
Operator: "911, what's your emergency?"
Hunter no. 1: "The other hunter, hunting with me in the woods, fell asleep."
Operator: "Check if he's/she's (not assuming genders) dead."
*Operator hears a distant gunshot*
Hunter no. 1: "What do I do next?"
I met a girl that was 6'5" and she fell on 9/11 and broke her arm. She really said "oh snap" like a twin tower.
My grandpa died in 9/11. He was a great pilot.
Two hunters are in the woods and one falls to the ground.
Terrified, he dials 911 and says, “Help! I think my friend is dying. What do I do?” The nurse says, “I need you to make sure he’s dead.” The hunter replies, “Ok, I’ll be right back.” The nurse is startled after hearing a gunshot. The hunter comes back and says, “I checked. Now what do I do?” The nurse replies, “I need you to make sure his heart has completely stopped.” She is startled when she hears the sound of a taser. The hunter comes back and says, “What’s next?” The nurse replies, “I need you to make sure his brain has completely shut down.” The nurse is once again startled when she hears the sound of a bone being crushed by what seemed to be a hammer. The hunter comes back and asks, “Anything else?” The nurse says, “Nope. That’s it.”
I feel bad for the guy in 9/11 who ordered a salami pizza. Instead, he just got a plane.
Why did the Twin Towers fall exactly at 9/11?
Because the terrorists thought that it would be fun to call 911 as a "prank."
Tons of people committed suicide on 9/11 by destroying government property.
Not to mention and by plane.