Yourself jokes

I don't know if this is a joke or a question, but:

If killing yourself sends you to hell, where does sitting in the waiting room get you?

Hey guys! Want to know something cool? Google Jesus' language. It's Aramaic.

Next, google "God in Aramaic". See the results for yourself. <3

You can't call yourself a baby boomer if you have never detonated an infant.

He was in a fight, then a person said, "Stand up for yourself!"

Who is yourself, and why do people keep telling me to kill him?

I told a furry, "Don't call yourself a joke!" I said to the furry, "Joke has meanings."

Suicide really isn't something to joke about, unless it's hanging yourself.

It's a really quicker way to die, and less blood spilled for your mother to clean up.

What did the creep do when the woman said, “Make yourself at home?”

He hid in her attic.

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

What do you tell twins that are in love with each other?

Go fuck yourselves!

Are you getting tired of life? Yes? Then call 180 go fuck yourself.

It's not our problem.com That's 180 go fuck yourself it's not our problem.com

A teacher wanted to teach her students about self-esteem, so she asked anyone who thought they were stupid to stand up. One kid stood up, and the teacher was surprised. She didn’t think anyone would stand up, so she asked him, “Why did you stand up?” He answered, “I didn’t want to leave you standing up by yourself.”

Emo girls are bad, but what's worse? Cutting yourself.

The only difference between you and Jesus is that Jesus believed in himself.

"How would you describe yourself in three words?"

"Lazy!"

What do you call yourself when you fist a midget?

A ventriloquist.

Tip for Kindness for the day.

Tip one. Always speak up for yourself.

Yes, letting someone else speak up for you is nice but also speak up for yourself, be brave if a mean bully comes along. Speak up for yourself and others if they need it. Best, Gwen

So, I was in the bathroom at school washing up, and this girl walked out of the stall and she was like, "Hey, can you make me laugh? I have been having a pretty bad day." And I was like, "Sure." I was like, "Come here." So she came over to me. I was like, "Girl, look at yourself in the mirror." And she started laughing so hard, and she said, "I'm so ugly."

Hi guys, I have a brain teaser for you! Leave it in the comment section if you figure it out. Here you go!

If you kill yourself (suicide which is technically murder), will you go to Heaven or Hell? Because you murdered yourself, but what if you were a Christian?

That was my brain teaser for you guys! Make sure you leave what you came up with for the answer in the comment section below!! PEACE OUT!!!! :)

Why is it okay to stab meat, but I can't stab myself? These woke lefties, BLM, Antifa, feminists, eco-warriors, pro-vaccine libtards are stopping your freedom and right to stab yourself!