Yours jokes

Sex

84 views ·

Husband: Honey, do you want sex?

Wife: No, thanks, I have a headache.

Husband: Is that your final answer?

Wife: Mmmmm.

Husband: Are you sure?

Wife: Yes.

Husband: No doubts?

Wife: No.

Husband staring a long time at his wife.

Husband: Okay, I wanna use my lifeline to call a friend.

Priest

4 views ·

What's the difference between Axne and a priest??

One waits till you're 13 to come on your face.

Hiker

7 views ·

Two men were on a hike through a forest when one of the hikers got bit on his ass by a snake.

The other hiker ran to the village 2 miles away and explained to a doctor there what had happened. The doctor told him to cut a cross with a knife where he had been bitten and suck out the venom, so he ran back to the first hiker who asked him, "Have you got the cure?"

Hiker number two just said, "Nah mate, you're dead."

Adoption

2 views ·

Son, you are not precious, so pack your bags because someone else is going to adopt you.

Dad, what do you mean someone else will adopt me?

Son, you're adopted!

Trash

2 views ·

Your Mom tells you to take out the trash, and the next day the Police are asking if you bombed the School.