Your Mum Jokes

Your mum is so fat, when I see her, I get depressed.

Your mum is so fat, flat earthers think she's round!

You're at a funeral. Your mum says be quiet, so you snigger at the body and say, "Bye forever, bitch."

Your mum is so ugly she could make an onion cry.

Your mum is so fat that when she wore a yellow coat people called taxi!

Your mum so fat that when she sat down she said, "Why are there so many people under me?"

My friend said to me that I am gay. My response? I’m as straight as that pole that your mum danced on last night.

Your mum said, "Who did it?" Ya nan!

What's the difference between your mum and the Twin Towers?

I would smash the Twin Towers.

Your mum is so poor, she can't afford free samples.

Your mum is gay; her name is Rachel.

Your mum so fat, she broke the stairs down to the fridge.

What do you do if your dick is smoking?

Get your mum to lick it.

Your mum is so fat, all her relationships are long distance.

When you are being spoon-fed and your mum says, "Here comes the airplane."

You are so ugly when your mum dropped you off at school, she got fined for littering.

Your mum is so fat, when she roleplayed Wonder Woman, she couldn't fit in the invisible jet.

Your mum is so fat that when she walked past the television, I missed a whole series of SpongeBob.

"Your mum has very small balls. Congrats! I told her, your balls are bigger than your husband's."

Why are tomatoes green? Because they rot, like your mum.