Your Mum jokes

You're at a funeral. Your mum says be quiet, so you snigger at the body and say, "Bye forever, bitch."

Your mum is a Rune Giant.

Your mum is so fat, when I see her, I get depressed.

Your mum is so fat, flat earthers think she's round!

Your mum is so ugly she could make an onion cry.

Your mum is so fat that when you walk around her, you get lost.

Your mum so fat that when she sat down she said, "Why are there so many people under me?"

My friend said to me that I am gay. My response? I’m as straight as that pole that your mum danced on last night.

Your mum said, "Who did it?" Ya nan!

What's the difference between your mum and the Twin Towers?

I would smash the Twin Towers.

Your mum is so poor, she can't afford free samples.

Your mum is gay; her name is Rachel.

"Your mum has very small balls. Congrats! I told her, your balls are bigger than your husband's."

Your mum is so fat, she thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team.

POV: Your mum is a bomber.

Your mum is so fat that when she walked past the television, I missed a whole series of SpongeBob.

Why are tomatoes green? Because they rot, like your mum.

Where do you find an orphan? Just look for your mum.

Your mum is so fat, she needs 3 different watches for 3 different time zones.

What do you do if your dick is smoking?

Get your mum to lick it.