Your dad jokes
Did your dad ever tell you he was going to get milk... But then never came back lol? 😅
You are like a thunderstorm; when you go away, like your dad, everyone is happy.
The reason your dad never came back with the milk is 'cause he ran 88 mph downhill.
If your dad didn't bring the milk, what are you dipping your cookies in?
I have a friend who doesn't have a dad.
He says: "You're useless, go to hell!"
Me: "Wait, why do you want me to join your dad?"
Speak to your dad before I put my hand up your ass!
What's the difference between you and your sister?
Your dad.
POV: Your dad is gone.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not your dad. LMAO.
Imagine me being 12 feet taller than your dad.
When you say to your dad...
AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
Dad be like...
Who wants my son?
Nan be like, "Me!"
Kid be like...
AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH GIVE ME #### ROUX!
What are roux, says nan?
Um, they're your life savings!
Nan be like, "Let's get some roux!"
Fat jokes and mom jokes😂
1. So fat when she sat on the toilet, she said, "A B C D E F G, get your fat ass off me."
2. So fat, your dad and her were in bed and tried to kiss. He’d have to slap her belly and ride the third wave up.
3. Yo mama so fat that when she went to Japan in a green bikini, they all started yelling, "Godzilla, Godzilla."
4. Your mama’s so fat when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!
5. Bill was so fat when he stepped on the scale, it said "to be continued."
6. Yo mama so fat, she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller.
Boy: "Mister, can I get candy?"
Mister: No, you shit head.
Boy: Why? :(
Mister: Because I'm not your dad.
What's the difference between your dad and the mailman? Nothing.
What's the difference between your dad and cancer?
Cancer came back...
What does your mum have in common with your dad?
They are both men.
Why did your dad FUCKING LEAVE YOU? He went to suck balls.
What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball?
She gagged.
Your Dad.
What do you call a boy in your mom?
Your dad.
Your hairline is as nonexistent as your dad.
When I was born, I saw you at the adoption center alone.
That day your dad got milk. 😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬