Two guys were walking down the street and one of the guys told his friend he could talk any Blond in the world into giving him a Blowjob, any Blond! So the guy bet him 20 bucks and pointed to this cute blond sitting on the side of the road and said alright let's see it! The other guy walks up to the cutie and says, Hi my names Dave and my Doctor just told me that if I didn't get a Blowjob from a Blond within three hours that the disease I have will kill me in 'oh less see now 22 minutes! She looked up at him with tears in her eyes and said "You mean I could save you from dying right now?" Then she says pull it out! 10 minutes later the two men were laughing and patting old Dave on the back when his friend noticed the blond sitting in the alley bawling her eyes out! So he walks over to her and says I would have thought you would be so happy for saving my friends life?! So she looks up him just crying her eyes out even worse and says" I could have saved my dad!"
Life is a bitch and people make it worse This Thing that I'm in ("am") is a Forsaken curse (beta)
A lady asked if I heard about the mass shooting in Ohio. I said yes my friend died there. She said I’m so sorry. I said yeah I tried telling him the police had good aim. Worse than that he just found out his sister was cheating on him.
What's worse than having an honourary degree from Harvard? Being homeless and haveing a honourary degree from Harvard.
"Knock Knock"
"Who's there?"
"John."
"John who?"
John broke down into tears as his Mother's Alzheimer's had gotten progressively worse.
What's worse than locking your keyes in the car in front of an abortion clinic?
Having to go back inside and ask to borrow a hanger.
Three nuns up to Mother Teresa and say Mother Teresa we would not like to be eaten anymore Mother Teresa says okay but first you have to do something Unholy so they a leave and come back 3 days later the first one the first one says Mother Teresa I did something Unholy I took a little kids bike Mother Teresa says okay who drink from the holy water and you are free to go II unlocks upset I did it something worse than her I slept with a married man the last nun walks up and says I did something worse than all of them Mother Teresa says oh god oh gosh are there in the third nut and says I peed in the holy water
What's worse than finding 1 dead baby in a bin? Finding 1 dead baby in 5 bins.
What's worse than 1000 dead babies hanging off a tree?
1 dead baby hanging off 1000 trees.
What’s worse than dropping your ice cream ?
The Holocoust
What is worse than 16 babies in 16 dumpsters? One baby in 16 dumpsters.
there's a truck full of babies. Whats worse that that. One baby being alive. What's worse than that. That baby having to eat it's way out. What's worse than that. That same baby coming back from seconds.
Three women were in heaven. The angel at the gates said, "How good the ride into heaven is for you, is determined by your commitment to your most recent partner."
The first lady says, "2 years, 2 side-hoes." She got an old lexus.
The second lady says, "10 years, 1 visit from a prostitute." She got a Mercedes-Benz.
The third lady says, "I never had a husband."
The angel says in response, "F*ck me and then you can have a lambo."
They all arrive in heaven, to see the second lady crying.
The first lady says, "I know we are dead, but it could be a lot worse."
"How!?" The third lady cries, "The angel has a flute for a d*ck!"
What is worse to have - a dead baby or dead Santa Claus? Santa. You need extra freezers for reindeer.
I don’t know what’s worse: Finding bucket loads of porn on my dad’s laptop, or finding out he was in all of them.
A man walks into a forest and sees a girl crying he asks her what is wrong? She replies I lost my, my family, my friends and my home the man then unties his pants and says then young lady ur day is about to get worse
What's the worse thing about having a congolese friend?
He always needs a hand.
What's worse than finding 10 babies in 10 dumpsters?
Finding 1 baby in 10 dumpsters.
What’s worse than sally in 1 trash can, sally in 13 trash cans
What's worse then 10 babies in a truck? One baby in 10 trucks.
