Word jokes

What’s a 5 letter word that starts with a ‘P’ that girls love to get their hands on? 😏

Why can't men play baseball?

Because no one can take the word "balls" seriously anymore.

Dad: I'll pay you 10 bucks for every day you don't tell a lie.

Next day:

Dad: Son, what's the ugliest thing you've ever seen?

Son: That ugly face of yours, go get a life, gosh, Dad, you're embarrassing.

The dad sulked for 3 whole years.

Proof that words really can hurt.

My teacher said, "Words don't hurt!"

So I threw my dictionary at her.

Eh.

A man is about to be hanged. His executioner asks for his last words.

The man says, “Man, it’s hard to think of something when your life is on the line.”

The "f" on orphan stands for family.

What does the F in "orphan" stand for?

"Family," but there is no F.

Fard.

If you look up the word "wheelchair" in a dictionary, you will see a picture of Stephen Hawking.

What do you call a dipshit?

A Charlie.

Braken Rodrgrigous?

What were the balloon's last words to his Father?

"Watch me, Pop!"

Why does the orphan can’t write a single word or sentence?

Because the orphan is dumber.

For some reason, people make fun of my name because it rhymes with something that starts with an F.

I’ll always remember my father’s last words: “I’m gonna sleep for a little.”

My sister is really disrespectful, and her famous words are, "You're not my parent!" The next time she says this, I'm going to respond back with, "You're right, because I would have worn a condom to protect from you being born unlike my dad did!"

The "f" in "orphan" means family, even though there's no "f."

Nutty.

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