Why jokes
My mom thinks I need to stop objectifying women. I think she is overreacting.
She asked why I broke up with the last girl, and I said,
"It didn't work out."
She told me to be more specific, so I said,
"I just told you, she didn't exercise."
Why is there air conditioning in hospitals?
To keep the vegetables cold and fresh.
A young boy is stood on the top of a cliff crying. A priest approaches and says, "Why are you crying my son?" "My parents just crashed the car off the cliff and died." "It's just not your day today is it?" Said the priest, unbuttoning his flies.
Why do we tell actors to break a leg?
Cause every play has a cast.
Why does the military recruit orphans?
Because homing missiles don’t target them.
Why do women hate having sex with midgets?
Because of their shortcomings.
Why do strippers never care about things?
Because the last time they gave a fuck, it was for $20 an hour.
Why is Hitler a better person than Jeffrey Epstein?
At least Hitler killed himself.
Do you know why most men are impressive cooks?
Because with two eggs and a sausage, they can keep women full for 9 months.
Why did the orphan go to church?
It was because he was looking for someone to call "Father."
Why should you always give an emo a high five in the hallway? You can’t leave them hanging.
It's better being depressed and suicidal than being happy, know why? Happiness never lasts forever.
Why is September 11th the best birthday ever? No one forgets it :)
Why does JD Vance have strained diplomatic relations with Turkey?
He took away their ottoman!
Why do trans women make the best golf course grounds staff?
They’re enthusiastic about getting rid of unwanted balls.
A Sunday school teacher asked her children on the way to service, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?" One little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."
Why did the autistic ice cream run away from the party?
She had a meltdown.
Why is E.T. better than an orphan?
Because he found his way home.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't hit a home run.
Why do you call a priest a father? Because calling them daddy would be too sus.