Middle

Anonymous

Why is 10 so scared. Cause it was in the middle of 9/11

Mum

demon queen

horror movies don’t scare me. 5 missed calls from my mum scares me.

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Sadness

Funny but sad.

I am Funny but sad. I submit jokes you’ll love. anyway…

Little Jimmy asked his mom if he could take a bath with her since he was scared if being alone. She said “sure just dont look up”. He looked up and said " woah what are those?". She replied " those are just headlights." He looked down and said “what is that?” She said that’s just a bush." The next day mommy wasnt home so he asked to take a shower with his papa instead. He said “okay but don’t look up.” He looked up and said “woah what is that?” His papa replied “that’s just a snake.” Later that night he asked to sleep with his parents. They said “okay just dont look under the covers.” After a while he grew bored and went under the covers. Jimmy screamed “mom turn on the headlights the snake is in the Bush!!”

Wood

The Special

So a guy is walking with a young boy into the woods. Boy “hey mister its getting dark out and I’m scared” Man “how do you think I feel, I have to walk back alone”

Jesus

Mechanical Manic

A robber breaks into a house while the residents are away one dark night. Eager to see what he can loot, he quickly starts searching through cupboards and dressers, grabbing valuables with a trained eye. Suddenly, he hears a voice come out of nowhere. “Jesus is watching you.” The criminal jumps, scared the residents are back, and freezes. After a few minutes of silence however, he assumes it was his imagination, and goes back to robbing. A couple minutes pass, before once again, the voice returns. “Jesus is watching you.” Quite confused, the thief searches the house and checks the front door, but nothing pops out as unusual. He finally decides to move rooms, and finds a parrot, but ignores it. Before he can begin to do anything, someone speaks again, “Jesus is watching you.” The robber realized it was the parrot talking! Going to the parrot, he asks it, “Are you the one who’s been talking to me?” The parrot responds, “Yes.” The thief couldn’t believe it. So, he asks another question. “What is your name?” “Ismael.” the parrot replies. The man scoffed. “What type of idiot names a parrot Ismael?” The parrot speaks yet again, “The same type of idiot that names a Rottweiler Jesus.”

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Depression

Hangy boi

Why can’t depressed people leave the maze?

Because their lives are the walls and they are to scared to meet the exit.

2

Little Johnny

classmate

one day the teacher said “there are 3 birds on a wire, a shooter shoots one. how many are left?” the teacher calls on lil johnny. “none” the teacher said ‘‘no but try again’’ lil johnny says " none bc if u shoot one the rest get scared and leave" the teacher said’’ not quiter but i like the way you think" lil johnny then says " alr teacher i have one for you. there are 3 women sitting on a bench, ones sucking it. the other its licking it, and the last on is bitting it. witch one is married?" the teacher then says "the one sucking it ofc" lil johnny then says “no the one with the ring but i like the way you think”

5

Wood

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

A guy walks with a young boy into the woods. The boy turns to him and says, “Hey mister, it’s getting really dark and I’m scared.” The man replies, “How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone.

Woman

Anonymous

A guy goes into his attic to clean it out and finds an old oil lamp. He thinks he could sell it instead of throwing it away, so he starts to rub it and out pops this genie. The genie says to him " Thank you for awakening me, I can grant you three wishes as a token of my gratitude." The guy wishes for a billion dollars, the genie grants it. The guy then asks for a huge mansion with 2 Lamborghinis and 2 Ferraris, the genie grants it. The genie says “This is your last wish so really make this one count.” The guys says “Well I’ve always wanted to drive out to hawaiian islands, because airplanes scare me to death, so I would want a highway that could stretch from here all the way to the islands.” The Genie says “That is asking for quite a lot and I’m not sure if I can pull that off, Is there anything else you’d want?” The guy says "Well I’ve been married and divorced three times, and I just can’t understand what I’ve been doing wrong. I’ve given my ex-wives all the love and care that I could but in the end it was never enough. I would want to have the ability to understand women. The genie thinks for a few moments and says “Do you want a three or four lane highway?”

3
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Octopus

Anonymous

What do u call a scared octopus

A octopussy

Bear

JimmiT

Chuck Norris has a bear rug in his living room. It’s not dead or anything, it’s just too scared to nove

7

People

Anonymous

Why don’t blind people skydive? – Because it scares their dogs too much!

0

Twin Towers

_!nf#8263

why were 6 scared of 7? 7 8 9 then why was 10 affraid? it was between 9/11.

what do u think was going thru the heads of the 9/11 victims on floor 43? floor 44 💀💀

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Field

Allison

A scare crow got promoted because he was outstanding in his field

Number

Daniel King

Why was 10 scared of 9?

Because 9 8 7.

Wood

Logan Paul

So a guy is walking with a young boy into the woods. They boy turns to the man and says, “Hey mister its getting dark out, and I’m scared… Can we go back now?” So the man says: “How do you think I feel, I have to walk back alone!"

0

Wood

spongebob123

A man was taking a young child into the woods. the young child said, “mister it’s getting dark and I’m scared.” the man replied with “how do you think I feel.” “I have to go back alone.”

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Offensive

Bob77

(Set up joke for the actual joke) So why don’t blind people go sky diving? It scares the hell out of their seeing eye dog. (Actual joke) When does a blind person know when he’s about to hit the ground? The leash goes slack.

Wood

Anonymous

A pedophile and a little boy are walking into the woods late at night.

The little boy says, “I’m scared.”

The pedophile says, “You think you’re scared? I have to walk back alone!”

3

Toilet

JokeMaker

How do you help a constipated person?

U scare the shit out of them